Most marriages end in divorces because both husband and wife are too busy to realize that something is wrong in the initial stages, when things can be rectified. There are many hints that need to be taken when something seems to be wrong. Indifference This is how the process starts in a subtle way.
If the couple is careful enough to recognize the difference at this point, they can save their marriage. Most of them are so busy with their work and schedule that slowly they begin to drift apart from each other. Initially, they don't have the time. Slowly, they are so used to being without each other that the other spouse doesn't seem so important a person. Gradually they drift apart till they realize one fine day that the other person isn't required in their life at all. Stop Going Out Together This is another gradual change that goes unnoticed.
It starts with one person having some work or being busy. Gradually, the couple stops going out together totally. One spouse realizes suddenly at a family get-together or a party that it has been a really long time since they have been out together. He/ she starts feeling hurt and suddenly let down by the other as it dawns on him/ her that she has never accompanied him to any important occasion. Staying In Different Rooms The couple slowly and gradually drifts apart and all relationship between them, both physical and emotional comes to an end. They share the same bed, but each one turns away from the other.
This slowly moves on to the next stage, where they start staying in different rooms. Wives Another factor is that wives suddenly become more independent. They start going for classes. They open a separate bank account for themselves. They suddenly will want to revert back to their maiden name.
Avoiding Going home There are also cases when the man suddenly loses interest in going home. He gets so sick of his wife that he'd rather spend his time at office or going out with his friends. He starts finding excuses for coming home late or sometimes not coming home at all. Having an Affair When there is no communication between husband and wife in the house, both tend to look outside for some kind of emotional and physical support. They fail to understand at that point that what they need is at home. All they need to do is open up and talk to each other.
Once they start having an affair, they start resenting the person at home. All this finally leads to ugly fights, court scenes and finally divorce. Fighting All the Time This is the result of all the above reasons. The couple becomes so engrossed in their own world and their own affairs that they are unable to accept their spouse the way he/she is. This results in fights all the time.
They cannot talk at all in peace. They cannot have a simple conversation without fighting. There is total resentment for each other and no peace at all in the house. Every single conversation results in fights with each claiming that the other person can do nothing right at all. There is no understanding between them for anything.
It is difficult to believe that it is the same couple that fell in love with each other and got married. They have no words of love for each other, only abuse. Thus, the above reasons are the causes for a divorce to occur. It is up to the couple to identify these causes in the initial stages when they occur, so that they can prevent their marriage from breaking.
Divorce causes a lot of heart ache and unnecessary hard feelings and depression. At least close friends of the couple need to assist the couple in this regard and help them save their marriage.
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more about a solicitor managed divorce see http://www.managed-divorce.co.uk