It is a hard choice to make. When you identify the signs of infidelity in your relationship, you are stuck with a very hard decision. Is a divorce in order if you find your spouse cheating on you? Once the secret is no longer hidden, what is the next step to take? Some people who have been hurt by infidelity reach for divorce in the heat of pain and hurt. But, in actuality, divorce can make the situation worse. There are good reasons to stay married after an affair.
Everyone is different, so the whole situation boils down to those involved. It will be a hard thing to get over as a couple, but it can be done. Very frequently, no matter how good and easy divorce looks, it can actually be a much harder road. Contrary to your feelings now, there is hope for your marriage after an affair. It will take a lot of work and time, but you can stay together. Specific reasons to stay married after an affair are varied.
Some people are simply opposed to divorce, whether it is due to religious, moral, or other personal beliefs. With the right attitude and humble perseverance, they are often able to rebuild and even thrive with a better marriage than they had before the infidelity occurred. If both members are willing to work hard, the marriage can be rebuilt and the romance can be rekindled by the true intimacy that can be gained when people commit to honesty and transparency. Many marriages actually lack this type of complete intimacy from the beginning and are, from the start, in danger of infidelity. Any deficiencies in marriage from lack of transparency to minor disagreements should be thoroughly addressed so that they do not cause problems later. Carelessness is another reason that some affairs occur.
Intoxication can lead to poor choices, including infidelity, but pale in comparison to the love and dedication involved in a long term marriage. At times like this, and affair is simply a very bad mistake or poor choice. It is possible to get over this, however, if both members of the relationship are willing to put in the time and work. It is important to make sure that the feelings associated with such acts are dealt with so that it will not reoccur in the future. There are various other reasons to remain as a unit after such an event. These reasons can include a child or children and their well being, as well as financial reasons.
There can be any number of reasons to remain together after an affair. Every situation is different and everyone has different reasons. No matter who is involved, however, it is vital to talk about the feelings and hurt that has come from this event. If these things are not addressed, then the people involved run the risk of seeing these feelings again down the road.
If you are contemplating whether you should stay in a marriage after an affair, it is wise to not make any rash decisions. Instead, talk things over with your partner, and also consider what will be best for you long-term. Be rational and make sure that you are not acting out of pain, anger, jealousy, or revenge, because in the end, nobody benefits from that.
Whatever your decision, make sure that you give yourself adequate time and permission to heal. The pain from infidelity is a life trauma that cannot be ignored regardless of the outcome of the relationship.
Infidelity creates a pain like no other. At the Affair Recovery Center we know from experience. We can help you rebuild your marriage. Don't suffer another day. Start healing from infidelity right now.